I Am Not Dead

But this blog is close to expiration, no?

I will resurrect it when I'm done studying for Boards (June 8th), thanks for your patience. . . and prayers!

This is What I do When I'm Stressed

OCD much?

I painted the backdrop of those shelves black and organized my books by color. I think it's better than doing drugs, and such.

Full view of the fireplace/bookshelves can be found here. If you're curious to know what that white pile is in the hearth, it's my white coat from intern year that I plan to burn very soon.

Had Enough?

I was having this conversation with a friend:

Friend: I'm coming out and telling people now that I'm going to do a fellowship.

[A fellowship is at least one more year of training AFTER residency. For those of you keeping count, that's about 25yrs of education.]

Me: Oh, good for you if that's what you want to do.

Friend: How about you?

Me: I feel like I have to choose between doing fellowship and having another child. These eggs aren't getting any younger.

Friend: Yeah, you're right. That's the reality of the situation. If you're going to do fellowship, that's gotta be your main focus for that year or two.

Me: Didn't you want to have another one?

Friend: Yes, I'm going to try and crank one out while I'm still in residency.

Me: Good luck with that, too.


Does it bother anyone how unnatural this child planning business is for female doctors? What about this idea of being 'in school' forever?

My YouTube Picks

Meet my babysitters.

I am guilty of sticking my son in this, placing a laptop in front of him and playing the following videos so that I have time for myself. Enjoy!

• Sesame Street with Feist singing 1-2-3-4


• Sesame Street with Nora Jones singing "Don't Know 'Y'"


• Mister Roger's 'Good Feeling.'


• The wedding aisle dance (my boy loves this for some reason)


• Fantasia's Pines of Rome & the third part live by Von Karajan.


• And for more classical tunes, Barry White's My First, My Last, My Everything.

Am I The Targeted Audience?

Always so cool.

There I was lying on my sofa feeling drained of all life and energy when a maxi-pad commercial comes on showing this beautiful woman jogging, presumably while she's menstruating. The next scene is of her showing up for rounds as a medical resident, after which she goes out for a night on the town with her girlfriends.


Really? All those months in pregnancy and breastfeeding seem silly now when I think about the joys to be had shedding my uterine lining. From now on I'll think of it as a career boost!

Grab Your Ankles

In the tradition of higher learning.

So imagine you landed the lead role in your high school play. Yippee, right? But now envision giving your lines on opening night without much practice, and as you make mistakes in front of everyone you get called out by your director. Oh, I forgot to mention that in this exercise of imagination, each goof-up puts someone's life in danger.

That's what it's like to be a resident learning procedures. I got a nice verbal equivalent of a paddling in the OR today. I know the Socratic method is "see one, do one, teach one," but how about 'see many, get hand-held through a few, and then do one'?

When I'm told that I am not good at something, and it's because I'm either inherently incapable of the task or that I'm a screw-up it's really hard not to cry. But that's the last thing I'm allowed to do. Plus, it makes all female doctors look bad.

I was feeling pretty down when I grabbed my lunch. Across from me was a surgical resident and as soon as he finished his sandwich an attending physician came in and started pimping* him. He didn't have the correct answer and the same thing happened. The poor guy was told, in front of everyone, that he really needed to wake up and start learning.

Frankly, there's not a seat soft enough for our bottoms today.

*This is the actual terminology for blasting your inferior medical resident/student with questions on the spot.

Booby For Life

I had to laugh when I read about this 'breast-feeding diet.'

Feed your baby the natural way and you'll look like Angelina Jolie! The bottom line from this article is the same ol' thing you'll hear in any diet debate: calories in needs to be less than calories out. The end.

I am not yet back to my pre-pregnancy weight. I have those last 10 pounds to go. When I was breastfeeding I did use that as an excuse to say, finish off an entire box of cookies, or more. Well, it's a new me and a new year. Time to get on the stationary bike and watch what I eat.

Getting thin is different from getting into shape. There are so many obstacles stacked up against mothers, though. We're extremely busy, have fluctuating hormones, and told "don't lift anything heavier than your baby" at discharge. -The perfect storm.

I've noticed that the first thing that goes is the lumbar/core strength, which is key for happy living. What's the number one reason for a doctor's visit? Back pain. How do we remedy that? I actually found the perfect solution online, no joke. If you follow these magnificent instructions from the Mayo Clinic I, Resident Mommy, promise you better quality of life.

Don't wait until you have spinal arthritis, I'm serious. Otherwise you'll see me coming at you with one of these.